Sunday, October 24, 2004

Sometimes when I'm sitting in an eddy on a whitewater river, I do something many other paddlers do on occasion. I ask myself, "Why I am on the river?" There are as many possible answers to this question as there are paddlers.

Why do I paddle whitewater? Maybe the real answer is the question itself. When you are sitting in an eddy, or behind a desk, or on a sofa in your living room, your idle mind questions everything and you think about problems. I don't ask these question when I'm sliding over a ledge or paddling through five foot waves. Maybe that escape is the answer. I don't think of much other than staying upright when I'm paddling big waves. Paddling white water helps me clear my mind of difficult questions. When I am on the river, I can finally stop thinking.

Why do I paddle whitewater? The other day I was floating through a river gorge looking at the fall colors on the southern mountains and I temporarily got lost in the beauty of the planet. I could smell Autumn in the scent of the drying foliage and see the reds, yellows, and greens and drink in the beauty of life. The blue sky reflected a shimmering image on the surface and I could submerge my hand in the water and become a part of the river. I can see God in the river, the sky, and the mountains. I was living in the moment, smelling the roses. You can't get that in the city, stuffed into an office, laboring in a workshop, behind the wheel of a vehicle, or sitting on a couch watching the football game.

Why do I paddle whitewater? Sometimes I think the answer is really just biological. There is no doubt that after you plunge through a rapid that is just a little more than you are comfortable with, you get a pretty good adrenaline kick. It's the roller coaster effect. The river is an amusement park ride, but taken up a notch. And it's addictive, you keep coming back for more adrenaline, and in bigger and bigger doses.  As you become comfortable at given level, it becomes necessary to find something bigger, something more dangerous, a river that will scare you again. It seems like paddlers are always looking for the next level.

Why do I paddle whitewater? Before I started paddling, I had just finished a rather lengthy education. I was accustomed to spending all my time at work, at school, or doing homework. When I finally completed this arduous trek, I found I had few friends outside of work or family. As soon as I started paddling whitewater, I suddenly found a lot of people who shared interests with me. You can meet a lot of interesting people on a river, and this is one other motivation for me.

Is it the clear head, the immersion in nature, the adrenaline, or the camaraderie that causes me to go onto the rivers week after week? It is not a question that has a definitive answer. But I never get tired of searching for one in the whitewater. See you on the river!